There are all kinds of lesbian stereotypes out there – most of which I have defied the majority of my life. Ok, so I did shave my head in college while I was majoring in Women’s Studies – but generally I have not fallen into those “oh-so-lesbian” cliches. I didn’t play softball, I wasn’t really a cat person, I could never stick to a vegetarian diet…and I rented a Budget truck (no Uhaul for me!) when I moved in with my first girlfriend.
Then I became a mom. As it turns out, there are several mom stereotypes that overlap with lesbian stereotypes. Suddenly I’m wearing sensible shoes and cargo capris. Fifteen years after coming out I finally had a major lesbian rite of passage when I bought my first pair of Birkenstocks. I don’t have much time to myself with two kids under three running circles around me – and so my showers are short and less frequent than I’d like leaving my legs often unshaven. This NEVER would have happened before kids! Heck, I might even look into getting a Subaru Outback – I bet the carseats would fit great in there. When we have friends over, it’s gotta be a potluck. If I’m going to get the house presentable for company there’s no way I’ll have time to cook a meal as well. And don’t get me started on the lack of hanky-panky in my life these days. Move over lesbian bed death, I’m plain old mom-of-young-kids style exhausted.
Are these indicators of my lesbian-ness or my mom-ness? I don’t know. I need to listen to some Indigo Girls and process.
I don’t have kids, but for me, the unshaven legs are 100000% pure laziness on my part and in no way any sort of lesbian feminist political statement. Maybe if I had my coffee BEFORE my shower, it would happen more often. Maybe.
Without the head shaving, I must be one too!