Terrebonne Here’s a purely entertaining Friday afternoon video for you.
Below Oprah Winfrey listens to Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka talk parenting roles and challenges during their twins’ first year. (Advert comes first.)
This clip starts out with Oprah asking, “Is one of you more maternal?” Hint: not NPH!
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Every time they used the word “maternal” I cringed. Maternal: Of or relating to a mother. Who is more like the mother? I think not. More patient or more nurturing, yes, but maternal? That’s one, small step from asking, “Which one of you is the woman?” Oprah, please. Missed opportunity for a teachable moment.
Totally agreed, and David & Neil might have leapt on it, too.
My read of male caregivers and parents is that they are redefining masculinity, fatherhood, and what we understand as “paternal.” Not that they’re borrowing the apron from “maternal” and traipsing around in it, as it were.
Maybe with a few more years of parenthood and reflection on their shaping of it, they’ll find some richer language. Maybe have a chance to read some of the great stuff written by gay and straight caregiving dads who are redefining what paternal can mean.