Family / Kids / Parenting

Parenting Three Kids and Surviving IMG_3058Sometimes I want to give the kids back. To whom, I am not sure. I wouldn’t put them in a basket on the convent steps, not yet at least–mainly because one is four and the others are almost eight months and they would roll right out of that moses basket and THEN I would be in trouble. My house is loud and my ears are sensitive. My mom always said I can “hear a gnat fart.” The nearly constant screaming or crying or the blowing of that damn noise maker my oldest picked up on Saturday is enough to send me over the edge.

I used to think I was patient and relaxed and maybe I was. Maybe in my PK (pre-kid) life I was relaxed all the time. I can’t remember that time. All I know is now and I am not patient or relaxed. In fact, I think I have become rather intense. I feel intense anyway. I went to a friend’s birthday party last weekend (at night, by myself…wow) and I was catching up with with some folks. After a couple minutes, I realized that I was talking about my intense sleep deprivation and our new house woes and my health issues. Overnight, my children turned my into Debbie Downer. The whole scene was made worse by the La Croix in my hand. I am really fun right now.

My three insane children made me this way. Most days I love them deeply. Some days I just love them. Other days, I dream of putting them in a cardboard box and mailing them (or myself) to some far away land.

I know this is temporary. I know the twins will sleep one day. I know my oldest will be in kindergarten in a year and a half and I know I will miss him terribly. I know my house won’t always be a pit. But some days the muck is deep and I am too tired to trudge through it.

They are all asleep–for the moment–as I write this. The twins will wake 7 to 10 times tonight. I just know it. I am getting more tired just thinking about it. Still, even when I am bone-tired and don’t want to have to interact with a child for week, I spend my night looking at pictures of them on my phone. I re-watch cute videos of them and quickly forget the trials of the day. I think that is how we survive. When the house is quiet, I am reminded of that deep love that makes me want to eat them for supper, and that is just enough to make me get up and do it all again tomorrow.


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